If you don't want to read my whole blog entry that is fine. But take the time to check out this blog- http://journeytoheal.blogspot.com/.
Last night I lay in bed unable to fall asleep. I gave it a good 45 minutes before I decided to get up and do something more productive. There was a blog that a friend of mine had shared with me that I had been wanting to read. I figured while the apartment was quiet that this would be a good time to sit down and look it over. I had no idea it would be such an amazing experience. It was a tear filled night, but also very comforting, cleansing and uplifting. I want to share a few of my thoughts and I hope that you will take the time to read some of the entries from this blog. I promise it is well worth your time.
The last few months I feel that I have found myself wanting more from my life. Truly my life is fabulous so I am not in need of anything in particular. I am sure we are all familiar with that feeling I am talking about. In truth I should say that I have needed more spirituality. I can not doubt that this is what has left me wanting. My spirituality goes in spurts. At times I am sure I have been over the top...almost selfrighteous. And other times I have been lazy..almost defiant. One day I hope to be able to figure out how to stay consistent, continually moving forward.
The BIGGEST problem from all of this is I have found myself being overcome with fear. It has consumed me at moments. Left me feeling empty and scared. Most of my fear has been completely unfounded. Yet I find it taking over my thoughts and dragging me down. It is true that fear and faith can not coexsist. And that is scary to think that I have let fear overcome me...where is my faith?
Last night as I read from this blog A Healing Journey I found exactly what I needed to humble me to my knees. Up to this point I know that I have been falling into the trap of thinking I know what is best for me. And if God won't give me what I need how can I ever be happy? Funny how we think we are so strong all on our own. Luckily he gives us gently reminders to help us stay the course.
Last night as I read I felt so strongly that God is aware of me. And if I will just turn my will over to him all will be well. Not easy...but well. That has been proven to me TIME and TIME again. I just keep forgeting. I am grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who doesn't give up on me.
Anyway, I highly recommend that you take some time to read from this blog. It is a girl that I know from BYU-Hawaii. I always thought she was a wonderful person. I just didn't realize how wonderul. The blog does better at explaining the whole situation so I won't go into detail.
These are a few of the entries that really touched my heart-
3 comments:
Thank you Megan. I needed this today.
I had those exact feelings. I am so glad an old friend could lift us up spiritually. Just what the doctor ordered!
meg~
I totally understand what you are talking about with fear. I will have to check out the blog you posted. I love you so much and we need to talk more. I feel bad that I am not a better cousin.
Can't wait to see you soon!
Sam
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